Saturday, August 11, 2012

Make Promises To Yourself

Keeping it together is tough!
I'm going to lie...

I'm the messiest and most disorganized person there is. I can't keep things in order unless I know the consequences will be severe.

For example, I have to work (most likely two jobs), write and produce a video a week. That may not sound like much. I don't have kids to take care of (thank god), but I still have issues getting things done.

I like to waste time doing nothing because it makes me feel good. Is that weird? I like movies and video games but they do very little in helping me achieve my goals. Should I write for an hour a day or thirty minutes? How creative and involved should my videos be? Should I ask for certain days off work or should I just cram everything in between the days and times I'm scheduled? I don't really know.

I think what's really happening is that I'm freaking out because I won't be in school this fall and I'm scared I'm going to have too much time on my hands and I'm going to waste it. If time and money are the same, they get wasted the same.

People always say what they would do if they had X amount of dollars but probably wouldn't do ANY of those things if they actually got the money. I can't count how many times I've said, "If I had time, I would do this and that." But if actually given the time, I would probably play games, watch videos online and watch movies that I've already seen a million times. I scare myself.

How does everyone stay on track? How did I do it in school? No one made me go. No one held a gun to my head and said, "Finish MSJC or I'll shoot." Somehow, I did it all by myself. I made a promise to myself.

I hate breaking promises, especially ones I make to myself. I've done it before and I felt like crud afterward. I think back to the time I was flirting with the idea of joining the Army and the recruiter was like..."Drop out of school, you can go later." But his 'suggestion' became a mandatory order and it didn't feel good. He wanted me to break a promise I made to myself and I couldn't do it. If I can't keep my own word, how could I swear to my country and be trusted? I walked away.

So I'll do that. I'll promise myself that I won't waste time. Here and there is fine, but I'll stay productive for the coming year. 

How do you keep yourself in check?  

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