Monday, July 28, 2014

Why Don't You Vlog About Your Life?

The other day someone asked me, "Why don't you vlog about your life?"

I paused life is personal. And besides, who wants to hear me talk about my life?

In addition to that, should I put my personal life on display for all to see? We know all too well that once something reaches the infinite corners of the Internet, it cannot be erased, denied or forgotten.

Putting those thoughts aside, I will say that my life off camera can be tumultuous one, just like anyone else. I suffer from stints of depression ( like most people do) that don't just go away by faking a smile. I have to actively (and tirelessly) pull myself out of it (over and over again) and that's hard. Do people want to hear about that?

Do they want to watch a 3 to 5 minute video of me talking about how I make myself happy when I feel sad or how much I hate college? Do they want to hear me talk about what it's like to pursue your BA degree in your thirties???

Those are the things I would talk about. Now that I've typed them out, they don't seem so bad. Perhaps it would be nice to get a glimpse inside the real me. Perhaps I should offer something more on my channel than characters and parodies. I'm real and I appreciate others who are real. (And I actually DO watch other people's vlogs, provided they talk about REAL subjects and not just superficial things.)

Ok. I guess this is me saying, I'll give it a chance. Maybe this week, or next, look for an Honest Vlog on my channel ------> HERE.

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

The Beth & Delilah Show

I've ventured into something new. Well, it's not exactly new. It's something I've been doing for a long time now but I recently decided to give it a real chance.

What is this thing I've decided to do? The Beth & Delilah Show.
I started making Delilah Shows way back in 2005. YouTube was a very new thing back then; so new that it would be another two years before I even heard of it.

I would record these little shows of my dolls walking and talking and insulting each other on Hi8 video tapes in my Sony camcorder. 

I showed the videos to everyone and people pretty much thought I was a weirdo (big shocker). I had fun and I didn't really want to stop.

When I got my first YouTube account in 2007, I uploaded Delilah Shows regularly. They didn't catch on because, who wants to watch talking dolls insult each other?

Eventually I had to take the videos down anyway because I was using music that I wasn't supposed to for the intros and outros. Back then, YouTube's archaic copyright system left me with a bunch of muted videos.

I got a new channel, made live action videos and moved on, but there was still a place in my heart that wanted to make Delilah Shows. I made a few videos and they were never really popular with people.

Last month I decided, I don't care if no one ever watches them. They make me happy. I've been told I should stop and that they're terrible, but I don't care. I'd rather make something that makes me happy. If you want to give The Beth & Delilah Show a chance. Go ahead!

Episode 1: Delilah gets therapy.

Episode 2: Beth & Delilah celebrate gay pride month.

Episode 3: Beth & Delilah have opposing viewpoints on doll equality.

Episode 4: Beth disappeared in a fit of anger but the show must go on...sort of.

Episode 5: Beth sets Delilah straight.

Episode 6 will be out July 24, 2014 at 6am PDT and you can click here to make sure you don't miss it. Beth & Delilah interview Optimus Prime!


I worked at KFC for ten years and all I have to show for it is this rap song I made up one day.
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Saturday, July 5, 2014

I'm Wasting the Best Years of My Life in College

This summer has given me a lot of time to think about my life goals and where I'm headed. I've had a lot of time to self-reflect and sort of check in to see if I'm still on track to my original goals.

I would say that I am, but the present is starting to look quite a bit different than what I thought it would look like. I had a lot of preconceived notions about college life before I ever set foot on campus. I assumed college would be a place filled with endless opportunities and supportive administration, however I'm finding the opposite to be true.

College has turned into that full time job that I dread going to. I dream of the day when I'll be finished for good so I can get started on my real dreams. Instead of launching me forward, I feel like college has just held me back.

Whether my degree is useless or not, college was something I felt strongly about. I can't deny the fact that I'm definitely better off now than I was ten years ago, but I refuse to be satisfied. There's always room for improvement.

I guess what the point I'm trying to make is that I'm eager to get on to the next thing. I'm an impatient person and I work fast so I expect immediate results. The best way I can explain it is when I finish an assignment for a class that is due at a certain time (with no exceptions) I expect the assignment to be graded and promptly returned to me with the same haste. This almost never happens but I still can't get over the frustration.

I had high expectations for this "Institution of Higher Learning." There was a time that University is all I talked about. I worked so hard to get here only to find out that it's not really living up to what I imagined.

Being a transfer student has its perks and disadvantages. The biggest perk is that I won't be in quite as much debt as the people who started as freshmen. The downside of this is getting credits to match up and getting professors and administration to care about my fate.

I don't know what it's like to be an adopted teenager, but I feel like being a transfer student in a room full of freshmen might feel like trying to get adopted at 14 when all the couples want infants.

I haven't learned anything significant in my classes. The education I'm receiving doesn't match half the things I learned at my community college. I guess I just thought there would be more. It's like I waited in line all night for a live show only to realize the artist is lip syncing.

Maybe our college degrees don't help us get jobs because we don't actually learn anything. I was lucky enough to delay college until my mid twenties. Doing this allowed me to get "real world" experiences that college simply can't teach you.

Professors of the world: Just because you assign reading doesn't mean you've taught anything!

If I can educate myself just reading, what do I need school for? Why am I in thousands of dollars worth of debt? It's a fucked system and now I'm beginning to understand all those people who protested college. Had they given concrete reasons instead of the tired, "You don't need a degree to be successful" spiel, then perhaps I would have listened.